MellowDrama

I was thinking that all the reality shows on our indian tv are take offs from international shows but tis one is truly ours. rakhi ka swayamvar- there has nt been anything like this on any tv channel of any country ever before but i do think that paris hilton can copy it and do it for the pleasure of tv viewers all over. wonder how the promos will run? i am tired of having affair after affair. now your very own paris wants to marry and settle. let the child in her splurge and enjoy some more.

there are many waays to kneel and kiss the ground. i have been often told that there is so much in my life for which i should be greatful to god so i thought that today i will kneel. 1. for being born in palampur and enjoying peace, love and nature that are inherent to the surroundings of my city beautiful 2. for meeji. she is the most benevolent, caring, not-so-gentle, loving, accomplished and prettiest grandmother that ever lived on this planet 3. for my pest sister who is a shoulder i have leaned and cried on, my sounding board, and all the things that sisters are meant for 4. for all those who have taught me to read and write- teachers, parents and relatives. i would not have known the joy that comes to me while i do these things had it not for them 5.for my lovely hair- straight and black 6. for my sense of humour 7. for different people who came in my life when i needed guidance and love 8. for my well functioning body parts that have served me well for these 28

i am loving it. it is totally mindless. can do with flickering attention. u can close your eyes and wouldnt have missed a thing. but the romance that is oozing out of the screen and the coy girl that rakhi plays...hats off. i mean i would nt have attributed grace to ms sawant but she has been graceful. i tink that all think that she doesn't have brains of her own but she can come up with some nice snubby comments for her 'hone wale pati' log. many ppl think it is stage managed but are at the same time wondering whom will she wed. i place my bet on elesh.

i am missing having a friend near by. the need to confide, to gossip, exchange woes, talk about infatuations and crushes, have someone to tell me things will get better. suggest ways and options. show me the path. share notes on books, the music. review the films. i think all the friends that last out after times of seperation are the friends that we need imminently in our lives. tenz is the fone a friend. we haven't seen each other since past 3 years or so and we rarely call but once we do and start talking about recently read books, new people in our lives- it is difficult to end the conversation. loveleen is the soup friend. she is warm and heals. harish is my all weather friend. he listens without interrupting to all my gharelu chik chik. he has never shied from pulling me up when i have been in doldrums. he is the friend whose presence is uplifting. There is a shield friend. the one who saves you from your own self via empathising and not sympathising. he doesn

a friend says that i am degenerating because i have stopped to write.I have always known, somehow, that i have to write. it is an essential need but i did not know how it was essential until he said to me that i should not stop to write and articulate. when he said this then i realised what my writing did for me. it helped me articulate my being. it helped me understand my self. i wrote diaries and kept journals not because i needed to recird the events of my life but because it made me get in touch with myself. the thing wise people say to look inside yourself- writing did that for me. then one day i lost myself trying to love another person. it was as if i wnated to blend in to this man so that there could not be two of us but just him. sounds very romantic and all but there was no such intent. it so happened because of the person i am. i tend to love whole heartedly. i get so influenced that i begin to speak the aame language as my love interest and forget myself, my family so very